Fahrkarten, bitte- or breaking the law

Public transportation is too easy to cheat here in Germany. There are no turnstiles like in London, Paris and NYC. It's based on the honor system.

You buy a ticket for 2,10 euros, you stamp it, you keep it with you. Simple.

But sometimes you are walking up the stairs with your computer, dog and bike, and your train arrives. And so you run as fast as you can onto the train. Oops, you forget to buy (or stamp) your ticket.

And sometimes you make it to your destination without and trouble.

And sometimes, plain clothed (!) policemen catch you. And they have no mercy. They make you pay the ticket violation right there. And if you don't have cash on you, they have been known to take you to the ATM (EC Card) to get cashola. Or they ask for your address if all else fails.

Claiming ignorance because you are a foreigner works rarely, if ever. Most of us really just didn't know how to pay for a ticket. But honestly, you do kind of know that there must be a system to pay for public transport, there always is.

I have experienced the dreaded 'farhkarten, bitte' inspectors on the S-Bahn. I really had no idea what they were doing. All of a sudden, people started flashing these cards to these guys; I just thought they were strange. They asked for my ticket in English and then I looked, and looked, and looked in my pockets and bag and everywhere, stalling just enough for us to reach the Hautbahnhof and to jump out with Diego. They were distracted by another person with a dog who also did not have a ticket, so I went downstairs to the bank, got some money (from my US account) and bought the 2,10 ticket.

That anxious interaction with the Inspectors is not worth it. Now, I try and buy a ticket each time I get on public transport.

That's my contribution to the German public transport system. It's the least I can do.

Ordnungsamt

I have never felt like someone who breaks the laws, or who fears the police. In the US, I usually felt that the police were here to 'protect and serve.' The meter maids are just pains in the asses, but I don't fear them.

But here in Berlin, I am scared.

There are fine ladies and men who rule the parking meters in Germany, and they are called Ordnungsamt. These are the people that get you if you violate order or rules on the German streets. And as you guessed it, there are a lot of rules on the German streets. And everday, I violate a couple.

I am still a newbie here, so I will cover just one area where I come in contact with the Ordnungsamt, and where I seem to constantly break the laws: in the context of my dog.

- All dog owners must pay a Hundesteuer which is an (annual?) dog tax. This can be anything from 75- 120 euros for your first dog. I have been convinced by Harald, a guy from my office who has Daly the Jack Russell Terrier, not to bother with this tax. They fine you 10 euros for not paying the tax on your dog; it makes more sense to avoid paying it and to get a fine every so often I am assured.

- Dogs in Berlin can be off leash but must be within 1 meter of owner. I'm not sure if this is a real law because the friendly Ordnungsamt can give you a ticket for having your dog off leash period, I think. Once I had Diego off leash and was walking down the street talking to my friend Richard in English. Richard turned to me and said that an Ordnungsamt had just tried to approach me to give me a ticket but when he heard me speaking English he turned the other way. I looked over to see him crossing the street.

- Dogs cannot be off- leash in a park. They give you tickets for this too. Today when I got to the park, on my bike with Diego running beside me, this guy Marvin told me that I just missed the O's who would've certainly slapped a ticket on me. I think the off leash ticket might be 20 euros.

- There is a list of dogs that are considered dangerous in Germany and therefore get special laws. A pit bull or a staffordshire terrier must wear a muzzle in public after the age of 7 months. The dog can also take a strict obedience test and be exempted from wearing the muzzle. Then does the owner have to walk around with a certificate or something?

- You must pick up your dogs shit. I do this religiously, so I feel self righteous and law-abiding.

Still, I am a rule breaker and I am not proud.

But I also want a nice life for my dog, so I will put him on a leash in the city, but I will continue to let him run wild in the park where there are no people.